dxyner (dxyner) wrote in fightdepression,

day 1

Today was the first day of my partial hospitalization program, simply speaking, that is five days of group therapy sessions. I was anxious about it, and nearly had an anxiety attack in the waiting room waiting for intake, but I got through that, and the intake.

So, the main experience for the day today was realizing that the ways that depression affects many of the people in the group seem to be much the same as the way it affects me. I felt more understanding in this group of people I feared I would not want to be around, than I have felt ever before in regard to my depression. Perhaps it was the experience of understanding coming from other sufferers and not just the clinical "That is perfectly normal" speech that comes from counselors and doctors. In any case, while I feel far from right and sorted, I felt like far less of a freak and a failure by the end of the day. That meant a lot to me.

Tomorrow I will be there on time for the art therapy part of the day which I missed today. I'm curious about that. I'm also excited to put into practice some of the tips I got today about sleep. (of course on of those tips was not to go on the internet right before bed, but ya know...) I think that continued journaling will help. The only thing that came up today that I feel skeptical of is the practice of daily affirmations. I'll give it an honest go, but it seems a bit too cliche to me, and bit too Stuart Smalley... I guess we'll find out.

Update again tomorrow.
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